I recently got hit with a ton of bricks. I was in this relationship with a great guy. The thing is, is that I hid it from my mom. BIG MISTAKE!!!! After she found out, things just kept spiraling. She told me not to end it completely but to just take a step back and really pray about it, which I did. That was Friday. Saturday I read in my devotional Psalm 139: 13-16 (if you don’t know it, look it up). And then on Sunday my mom brought home a list of Bible verses and Psalm 139: 13-16 was in that list. A lot of people might think it was just a coincidence, but as I continue, hopefully that thought will dissipate.

On Sunday I could feel God working in my life because I couldn’t hold myself together. We went to talk with someone at the church and she was saying everything my parents were saying; which was that I needed to find myself before I could be in a relationship. Monday night I had a dream of my wedding. I know what you’re thinking, “Oh, every girl dreams of her wedding” well, just hear me out. It was extremely realistic, the only thing that I didn’t really understand was that I didn’t see the grooms face. His back was turned the whole time. One thing I later learned on November 1^st was that my mom prayed that God would speak to me in a dream. Another devotional was talking about having faith. I thought I was until that Thursday, which was the 1^st. I went to my young adults’ group and my leader went through his lesson and it was on love. And guess what verses popped up; Psalms 139: 13-16.

After his lesson he did this individual prayer time with us. I was 3^rd in line (we were kinda popcorning). So, it was my turn and I told him about my past and what I was struggling with and he told me the exact same thing everyone else was. That I need to figure myself out before I see anyone. It really hit hard this time. The fact that 2 people I don’t even know that well were both telling me the same things my parents were. After I stopped crying, I made my decision. I decided to end it. If I had kept it going it would have torn me and my family apart. He understood and was kind about it, knowing I need to figure my life out first. That night after I got home, I told my mom. Of course, I cried again and I felt like a weight was lifted off of my shoulders. I am not saying anything bad, just that the relationship wasn’t right at the time and that was the toll for ignoring God. My mom told me that it might not be the end, just right now isn’t the time.

My experience was definitely new and really helped me snap my head on straight. One thing I learned from this, is that you are never too far in the dark for God to find you, you just have to let Him light up your soul.